Mr. Toad's Wild Ride

When I went to Disneyland, Mr. Toad's Wild Ride was in the category of "olde but goodie".  I haven't been for years so I don't know if it's still there.  I had no idea what to expect the first time I went as a kid, but I quickly found a thrill in the sharp twists and turns in the dark - having no clue where the car was turning next.

For the last 6 months I've found that my life has suddenly taken a "wild ride" of it's own.  Listening now to my daughter's yelps and baby growls while on her back, she unleashes her fury on a (clean) wet rag I just used to mop up her face after eating sweet potatoes (much like a puppy with a new chew toy) and I find myself looking back on some of the twisted parts of becoming new parents . . .

My daughter was born with the innate ability to call out to college frat boys.  She'll have no problem getting into UCSB with this one talent alone.  I've already ordered her a pink shirt that says "I'm not allowed to date.  Ever."  Hopefully she'll see the wisdom in wearing it often.

 

I'm not sure how this one even happened, but I honestly thought only little boys could aim and fire when you're changing their diaper.  Needless to say it sprayed everyone in the room, the rug and the guest bed.  I might have screamed out a little bit.

 

HOW many diapers can one little bity baby dirty?  My next question was, how young can you start potty training???

I've dabbled in archery, range shooting and the like, but nothing prepared me for moving target practice.  And watch out, just because you sit directly behind her doesn't mean you aren't part of her canvas.